Thanks to @naturalmedicine for giving me the opportunity to declare my health goals this new year! It's fair to say that since turning 40 some six years ago now., my health took a bit of a nosedive! I've dealt with various ailments and issues, and many of them have been related to one habit that I have not stopped since a very long time.. I am referring to smoking tobacco and herbs!
My X asked me why I smoke recently.. a question she has asked me many times.. but i was never really sure exactly. I liked how she once said that I crave the feminine energy, and smoke the herb since it brings the feminine qualities to our heart and fulfils that desire. I liked that, it was true, but it was not the only reason. So, recently i realise that I smoke more when I am bored or upset and especially if im feeling lonely.. Lately i think i feel all three of these things, and that is probably why Im smoking a bit more than usual, which was already quite a lot. My only rule that I have made for myself is that I have to drink a large glass of water with a squeeze of fresh lime every time i smoke one... so now I have quite a drinking habit, im on about 30 cups of water a day!
Ill never really know to what extent smoking constantly for so long has held me back, or effected my life path. I have achieved quite a lot in the past despite being constantly stoned, and can do just about anything when I am high. I am so used to it that often it can be harder to do some things when I am not, such as singing, drumming, and even driving!
I think one of the biggest prices I have had to pay for smoking is both health, and also my social life, or lack thereof. I get really open and extra sensitive when i meet people, and don’t really feel comfortable with chit chat and meeting new people.. All the energies come right in and i get a bit overwhelmed and then anxious... So that sucks, because there are quite some interesting people who pass by that I miss.. and who knows what opportunities fly by when that happens!
So just as importantly comes my health, and in particular my breathing and that sore throat I have had since nearly 2 years now! I have had pretty serious breathing issues this past 6 years, and whilst it is a heck of a lot better than it was just three years ago, it is still a big issue and one that I had better resolve before it gets worse. That sore throat was really just the icing on the cake, almost like my body telling me,, hey Alex.. its really time to stop because the only thing you haven’t tried to get rid of this constant throat pain is stopping smoking! Oh how stubborn I am!
Actually, here is a good time to share with you the potentially miraculous healing of this long standing sore throat, just last week.. Im not 100% sure yet, but I went to an allopathic doctor about 10 days ago now to get some help with it, and to get some reassurance that I don’t have throat cancer.. which was something that was kind of concerning me! (thanks Google)... The results were largely positive, and I got the reassurance i needed.. but most interestingly.. it seems like this doctor has somehow healed me without me even taking a pill!? You see, at the end of the consultation he told me that basically im really healthy, and it would be good to reduce my smoking.. but that probably wasn’t the leading cause of my throat issues. He also recommended i drink some Whisky without ice, he said that a few times ( i THINK he was joking but i might try it)... and then finally i shook his hand. Sometimes in India when we shake hands they don’t let go and just sort of hold your hand.. The doctor did that with me, and whilst we chatted a little he just continued to hold my hand.. it felt really nice, im quite sensitive to energies, so i just held his hand nicely for a minute or two as we finished up talking.
I didn't think anything of it really, but my Israeli friend who came with me made a curious comment and said that she thought he was sending me healing energy. I agreed, because holding hands and sharing positive vibrations is very healing, the power of touch and Reiki should not be underestimated! SO, the interesting thing is, ever since then my throat has almost totally healed up, I haven’t felt any twinges or soreness for days now, except for just one or two moments when i feel something.. but really nothing compared to how it was!
TO me, this is quite amazing really because I have been dealing with this every day, almost all day for nearly TWO YEARS NOW! It's hard to believe that it is a co-incidence, and i have this feeling that my new 'Allopathic' Doctor is an Angel in disguise! What a great ruse, to pretend to be a normal doctor and then just heal your patients at the end with a hand shake ;-)
So whilst that has lessened my desire to stop smoking for health reasons, I do still feel motivated to reduce it drastically.. It IS time to move on to greater things, and with ecoVillage and other stuff I have going on, I'm pretty sure I will accomplish more! So wish me luck and love, because there is ONE thing i really cant seem to do when I am stoned, and that is VLOG!.. and I really want to VLOG this year and start sharing my feelings on things I feel its time to speak out about!
Thanks for making it to the end of my story <3 have a beautiful day folks.. and don’t forget.. healing can happen when you least expect it!